I should call this my family venting blog :)
I should be grateful to my family, and for once I even mean some of my extended family. My mom had invited me over to her house on the 18th to have dessert with my Aunt Adel who is by far my favorite Aunt since she is the only one I really know well. When I showed up, my Uncle Richard and his wife (I think her name is Karen, but I think I am wrong) my Uncle David and Pricilla, and Aunt Adel and Jim were there. Very much a shock and pleasent surprise. My Uncle David sure is a talker and overexhuberant person. He had his digital camera and was taking random pictures of people's ears, noses, and sneaky pictures of Jim since he did not want his taken at all. I thought he would appreciate my picture that I sent out in my christmas cards, but he seemed to occupied with, well being hyper. Later on he wresteled with my parents dog Jake just as aggressively as my dad does. David was literally draggin him across the floor by Jakes back legs.
I have a crazy family and think I have come to the conclusion that I can not handle being around them for more than one evening or day. I was so ready to leave Christmas day when my sister pulled me off the couch because my mom HAD to use it to hold Nolan to let him fall asleep. If she had not yanked me up with no warning and then got mad at me because she thought I was being some kind of jerk I would not have looked annoyed with her. One can stuff ones annoyance only so long, and my defense of being amused had worn off. I was ready to go. Of course I am never let off the hook that easy and thus my frustration level started to rise. I was asked to take my Dad home, no problem, I was asked to make sure to get some Turkey from the house, no problem, I was asked to take Dad home, I already said I would...no problem, I was asked if I liked white meat or dark meat better, I like white meat better...no problem, I was reminded of how mad I was when I got yanked off the couch, where is Dad?, I was asked if everything was ok, I blurt out while my sister is still there, "Ok, I am starting to get really frustrated, and I sometimes I get tired of not being let go when I am ready and need to go from events like this." My sister looks at me with an, "Alright, Jonathan obviously thinks he is more important than anyone" look and walks away. The next day my mom called and apologized about some of the behaviors she needs to change (I should call her and say thank-you for that I guess) and that she wants me to be able to "be myself" around the family. When it comes down to it, I don't believe that about any of my family. It will be an amazing time in my life when I can talk freely to my family like I do my friends.
(I always remember what a concelor said to me once, "Are you trying to make us feel sorry for you?" And the answer then was yea, and more than likely I am doing it again now. lol)
It's Officially Winter (aka songs in my head)
Crazy isn't it? Well, I guess it depends where you live, but here in Minnesota it's been cold since last month. I am just glad that it has not snowed this week since it is my week to shovel. "You are...my fire...my one....desire...and I know....when you say...I want it that way....Ain't nothing but a heartache...tell me why?....aint nothing but a mistake....tell me why....all I want to hear you say...is I want it that way...tell me whyy....whyyyyyyyy" Maybe I will just write down all the random songs that go through my mind today. 10:36am, "I feel pretty..oh so pretty...I feel pretty and witty and gay! And I pity....anyone who doesn't feel the same...."
11:12am: "Wouldn't it be nice...lallalala....were could spend all day in the sun...would it be nice...lalalalal...something or other all day long...." (I am whistling the tune) "wouldn't it be nice."
12:13: "da da da da da da da da da...da da da da da da da da....one love...one love...da da da da da da da da da" (this one I only seem to hear at boom)
12:45: 'March of the Tin Soilders'
1:45: So I am leaving work ealry today because there is no work really to be had, and here is the last song in my head. "Hey sister soul sister....gotta get that dough sisters..."
The Survey
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Jonathan Howard
Birthday: 05/13/1976
Birthplace: Minneapolis
Current Location: Minneapolis - Edge of Uptown
Eye Color: Green
Hair Color: Brown
Height: 5'10"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right Handed
Your Heritage: I am a mutt, Irish, French Canadian, Native American, Danish, Swedish, English, etc.
The Shoes You Wore Today: My black Born slip on shoes that really have seen their last day but perfect for shitty walking in the snow weather
Your Weakness: I believe your strength is also your weakness, so being personable sometimes to a fault
Your Fears: Uncontrolled Heights
Your Perfect Pizza: Hmmm....I really like the Baked Potato Pizza at Pizza Luce
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: To be debt free
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "lol" or the ":)"
Thoughts First Waking Up: I don't want to go to work....or I don't want to go to work..Wait! It's Saturday! *rolls back over to sleep*
Your Best Physical Feature: hmmmm....my smile, and my butt...oh and sometimes I like my arms and stomach. :)
Your Bedtime: usually midnight on the weekdays and whenever on the weekends
Your Most Missed Memory: That loving feeling :)
Pepsi or Coke: hmmmm...neither, but forced to choose I will say Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: I call it McDonalds
Single or Group Dates: Single, though a group date let's the other person see more of ones personality I would think. I have never been on a group date.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: don't care
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Smoke: no
Do you Swear: yes :) (I so want to steel someone else's answer who wrote Fuck yea!, but I wont')
Do you Sing: Not really, but I like to pretend I can if I ever go to church
Do you Shower Daily: who doesn't?
Have you Been in Love: Most definately yes
Do you want to go to College: If I can help it no, I have already been down that road and graduated and see no need to put myself through it again :)
Do you want to get Married: ummm....my goal is to make it past the year marker in dating right now.
Do you belive in yourself: Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't
Do you get Motion Sickness: nope
Do you think you are Attractive: Sometimes I look in the mirror and say, "Damn! I look good" and other times I say, "Damn I need to get to the gym!"
Are you a Health Freak: hahaha...no...but others think I eat healthy..they don't see me eating my pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream at night though.
Do you get along with your Parents: I am amused by my parents and that is the most one can ask for
Do you like Thunderstorms: when cuddling for sure, and since I live in the city and think that Tornado's can't touch me here I enjoy them on my own too.
Do you play an Instrument: I used to play Trombone, but now it is used kind of like a plant stand
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: oh yes
In the past month have you Smoked: ok fine yes...I was drunk and had some of my friends pot...a quick puff...but it was just random and weird that it happened.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: nooooo (unless you count Alcohol as the drug that it is :)
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yea, and still haven't found a good match.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: sure
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: nope, but a huge bag of
peanut M&M's :)
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: no, but if anyone is game for going to Nami for happy hour sometime soon I am game
In the past month have you been on Stage: Now I actually had to pause and think about this...why I am not sure since I am not normally on stage. And the answer is no
In the past month have you been Dumped: hard to get dumped when you all your dates lately turn into friends
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: no, it's frikin winter right now! But I did go Skinny Dipping this summer at the old Hidden Beach at Cedar Lake at Midnight with a full moon with a friend and then other random people showed up and went in too. What a cool experience.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Define Stole. I don't think I have.
Ever been Drunk: ummmm....yea.
Ever been called a Tease: ahem...yes...but I am a nice friendly tease who tells you what I am doing. Otherwise it's just mean to tease.
Ever been Beaten up: hate to admit it but yes, in 7th grade on the bus. My upper lip on the right was never the same after that :)
Ever Shoplifted: I think I stole Tic Tac's on accident once
How do you want to Die: Old and without pain
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Famous!
What country would you most like to Visit: Canada...you know I want to say I am kidding, but it's right near by and so much of it I have never seen. I really want to go to Toronto. I want to go overseas too,
Santa and Me
My Santa and Me like to climb up a tree. My Santa and Me are the best friends there could be!
Ok...so I guess I have decided this is the place to post all the random shit that maybe I would send in mass e-mail form...not that I will not send things in mass
e-mail, but well...I think the point has been made. So here is the most recent picture of me. I love it. The first time I EVER had my picture taken with Santa (aka Satan)was in 1994 which would have been my Senior year at Park Center High School. My mom was working in downtown Robbinsdale at Glenwood Floral, with a gay man with HIV mind you, and it was their company work party. It is really a horrendous picture and it's too bad I don't have the button on hand to scan so you can see it's hideousness. That's right they made a button made right then and there of Santa and Me and the year declaring
1994 curved undeneath us.
Nothing to do Day 123
Boredom. That is something I never used to think or say, but lately that has defined my life on more days than I would like to shake a stick at, and I like shaking sticks at things. Ah, who am I kidding, I was bored in the mailroom all the time and I didn't feel like I could sit at a computer all day long just for the hell of it and now I can and it looks like I am working. The difference is that everything I do now is sapoused to be billable time, and by billable I mean every moment of my day should be related to some building that we are currently building. Problem is this month nothing seems to be being built. I really like the word build. (Bartenders build buildings boldly) It's like I a retail job on a dead night when no one is around but you have to be there in case someone shows up. It really sucks staring at a computer screen, with no interpersonal interactions, and being super warm, even in short sleeves, in a constant mind numbing state all day. I know some may be jealous, but why? I would much rather be pulling my hair out busy because then I would have a reason to drink socially, and would enjoy sitting around at home doing nothing becuase it would be decompressing. I sit around doing nothing all day so if I go home and do nothing it feels like I am taking crazy pills. (Obey my dog!)
So movies I need to own and was just reminded of one just now and watched a favorite one last night that I forgot about. I am sure there are more, but here we go for now.
1. The Emperor's New Groove (Beware of the Groove! Groooove.)
2. Romie and Rochelle's Class Reunion (I'm the Mary!)
3. Bring it On (These are not spirit fingers....THESE are spirit fingers!)
4. Zoolander (How do you expect children to learn if they can't even fit inside the building! It needs to be at least.....two....three times as big!)
5. Mean Girls (I'm not a normal mom...I'm a cool mom.)
6. Clue (Let us out! Let us out! Let us in! Let us in!)
The Holiday Party
This is reply that I sent to an e-mail...the first part may not make much sense..but it turned into a rather decent story.
Well, I am glad you enjoyed it. I knew you would have the sense of humor to receive the picture :) And I am hip? Who knew? I did not get my picture of me and Santa yet, I will send it your way though when I get it...how is that? And it was a drink free night for me, but still it was interesting. A wife of an Architect here got kinda tipsy/maybe drunk and she was upset at her husband slightly and she seemed to enjoy making snide comments to me. Normally I get along great with her, but like I said she had been drinking. The ultimate comment she made to me was when I was talking about all the cute guys that had just started working for HGA with my friend Victor (he does not work here) and tried to include her with it, and she blurted out, "You know, one day when you are not drinking, you will realize when to stop talking." Now I had taken all the other comments and pushed them aside, but this one could not be ignored. Back in the day I would have just sat there, in fact the first time this ever happened to me was back in High School when this fat, insecure girl that was at the table where I was said, "Do you ever just stop talking?" Well, I took that personally and just shut up right then and there and felt ashamed, and of course she had to dig in deeper. "Isn't it great that Jon isn't talking? God, it feels good to be able to hear myself think." Or something like that. A lot has changed since High School though and I have learned if someone shames you in front of a group of people it is your right, nah your duty to shame them back. After the right amount of pause, I sarcastically said, "Well, first of all I have not been drinking, but thank-you so much for that advice.....it just really warms my heart that you care." And then I was quiet so the others in the group could have the chance to say something and of course no one did. Bitch deserved it. :) On the way out I said goodbye to said Architect and his wife and she said, "It was nice talking to you." "Oh, yes, it was really a pleasure," I said in my best Minnesotan, passive aggressive, bitchy tone.
God Forsaken State
It's frickin' cold outside...and it's only gonna get worse let me tell ya. I actually turned up my heat. I have to admit I just got tired of sitting in a cold cold house underneath a blanket and needing to wear slippers all day long. I know I need to also put plastic on my windows and I also need to see if I can get my car in the garage. Maybe it's just a sign that I am getting older that I am tired with living with out stuff, living in a cold house, and needing to scrap off my car every morning. Sometimes I think there is even a part of me that understands why people live in the suburbs, but then I change my mind and think "If I only had more money." See if you live in the Suburbs you actually have to make a "trek" to anything you want to get to and I can just walk two blocks up the road and feel cozy at Gigi's. If I had more money I would be there everyday. If I had more money I would be more happy. No, not true. Happiness is a day by day thing where sometimes it comes out the winner and sometimes it's buried where you almost believe, and sometimes believe, that it does not exist. (side note, recent work crush just walked by...so handsome)
Anyway, today on the drive in an inspirational thought hit me that sometimes does. Back when I was interpreting at Options North I was still in my last semester of College. I needed to go to my parents to watch the dog for them, but I also needed to get some homework done. I was complaining to my co-worker about how the dog would not leave me alone when I got home and that I would get nothing accomplished. That's when she said, "Who's in control Jon, you or the dog?" Simple yet so profound to me at that time and even now in my life I apply it to situations, smile and wish all healthy advice would stick with me like that had.
